i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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