Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize