yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
