Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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