Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
