Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Dicks are not precious.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
