well you can't waste a boner
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
These tits shall not be calmed
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
