Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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