Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I think a kid would responsible me up
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
