He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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