Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I have post one night stand depression
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
