it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
so much tequila, so little girl.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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