I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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