There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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