I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Randomize
