"it" just moved
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Just invented taco cereal.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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