Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
i think i just lost a toe
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize