If that was your dad, he is hot
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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