Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
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So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
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How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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