weddingsv make me drug and hornr
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize
