She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
