And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
