Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
ttyl tear gas
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
