thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
