okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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