I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
