oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
