I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
is it fun? or sober?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
