upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
