Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
