Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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