I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
