I wish I could teleport
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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