OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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