have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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