If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
