Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
