The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
