Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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