I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
