Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
