Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
