I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
do nipples grow back?
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