Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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