Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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