I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
