Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
