operation have a gay friend backfired
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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