Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Pooping to opera.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize