so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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