Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
